I see you — staring at me with a baby on my hip, It’s obvious I’m “a little frantic.”
I see how fast you judge me and how quickly your eyes go to my wedding finger.
There’s no ring on there. Trust me I’ve checked.
But don’t feel sorry for me, don’t think my life is a wreck, that I was forced in this unfortunate predicament, or that I was irresponsible.
I am PROUD of my decisions and my life.
I’m PROUD of the woman I’ve become.
I’m PROUD of the child I’m raising.
What if I told you I was previously engaged?
What if I told you the entire wedding was planned?
What if I told you I was unhappy for a long time and CHOSE my current life?
Would that make a difference?
I think it would.
I look at your life and wonder if you’re happy with the life you’re living, with the relationship you’re in, and the routine you put yourself through every day. Does that ring on your finger and those family photos in the hall simply show that you’re happy?
I see the judgement on a daily — ahem, I mean on an hourly basis. Everywhere I go I’m certain to get a judgy look from someone. I’m not condoning anyone to go out and become a single mom on a whim; it’s tough as shit. But every day I learn a little more about myself, I know what I like and what I don’t. I’ve become extremely resilient and mentally tough as nails. I do it all on my own and because of that I become more and more the woman I was meant to be.
So stop the judging. Stop feeling sorry. I feel sorry for anyone stuck in a
loveless relationship with no strength to discover what they’re really made of.